hey...
I don't know if anyone really reads this, or what...but today this post is a vent.
This is the first day I EVER had to get out of my face with someone. And it was LONG overdue.
growing up my dad always instilled in us:
* respect. Respect to our elders.
* do the right thing. if you see someone drop a dollar on the floor, pick it up and give it back to them.
* always help. you see someone struggling, help them.
* be generous. if you see someone who needs something and you have extra, give it to them.
now my dad left and whatever but those values are deeply engrained in me. SO much that I aim to teach my children those very things. even if it does mean that they belong to a whole other time period. BECAUSE that's how I feel at times. Like I don't belong because all WE deal with is:
people taking advantage of our good nature. our kindness. Crapping on us every chance they get. Us being there for everyone when they need it and no one being there for us when we are in need. Neighbors who do what they want when they want not caring. customers who pay when they want, complain, are disrespectful.
This morning hubby went to see a tenant who was very close to being evicted...(we should've done it a LONG time ago but see above) they owe a light bill that was put on our names. it was run up high and we thought it was taken care of.
well the guy now says it isn't their problem. it's ours. that's how my hubby left for work today. with that on his mind.
the guy comes over to the shop and starts saying how he feels disrespected that hubby approached him in front of his wife, yadda yadda how the last guy who did that wound up in the ER.
That set me off.
HOW DARE HE. HOW DARE he come to my shop and start spouting nonsense to me. I went and took a large file we have of paperwork because while we are stupid enough to be kind and get crapped on we are smart enough to have a paper trail with their signatures on it. AND I TOLD him. I LET him know. His wife wasn't too sick to start all of the paperwork and sign everything and read all of the stuff. So when it comes down to it we know he's full of CRAP. Stop playing the "my wife is sick card" because guess what homeboy, WE ALL have our problems!
WE are SICK. we are tired. we have FOUR kids that have been suffering because everything we have has gone into that house. into people who have leached and don't care, and who arent worth it anymore. All we do is WORK to try and pay it all off, I have a 2nd job to try and help out! It's all a blur but I shocked the guy. enough for his anger to turn into almost crying. He changed his tune after I was done. He was probably expecting me to stay quiet and nod my head like I usually do because I really do not like confrontations. AND hubby's the one who deals with the tenants.
Am I proud? No. I didn't want "the Brooklyn" to come out of me. (As hubby always says, LOL) But I needed to. It's all been building up for so long.
DH is going for testing now because the DRs are concerned about the cause for his headaches. They think it may be Glaucoma. He's been on some pain meds for the headaches he's been going through but they still don't seem to be doing much...SO he's going in for an X-ray, an MRI, and early next month an eye specialist. that was the soonest he could get the appointment for. :(
we have tons of heavy and hard life changing decisions to make. What's hardest is the feeling of isolation we have because of us not wanting to worry anyone we make it all light when it really isn't.